So this will be extremely disappointing because I don't have anything to write about, but I am noticing a lot of profile views. But alas, no comments. If you are here, and you're reading, let me know! Even if it's not really anything particularly interesting. I know I don't talk about a lot of cool things, but just say "Hey!" It'd be nice to know you're out there. I'm friendly, I promise. =]
Respectfully,
me
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
I'm Not So Good At Frequently Updating
A) My life is really boring, therefore I have nothing interesting to write about on this,
or
B) I'm just too lazy to do it.
Either way...
Yesterday was... interesting... Me, Casey, Becca, Jake, Ryan, and Owen went to Canobie Lake Park as a last hurrah since Bec, Casey, and Jake leave this weekend for school. I'll see Jake when I move out there next weekend because we're at the same college... Bec and Casey however... well... I'm going to miss those lovely ladies. Ryan I will probably see again next week because he's staying home for school. Owen... well our little high school buddy will be around I'm sure.
Leaving the park is when all the fun began. We arrived at Casey's house, the first victim of the drop off... well here and Becca cried and I of course made fun of them for it. Not without hugging them, and singing to Casey though. "Oh, chiiiiild. Things are gunna get ea-si-errr" Back in the truck, and on to my house where Becca clung to me for a while before saying goodbye.
Then, for no reason whatsoever I had a breakdown. All of a sudden the reality of college set it and I just had to go for a drive. I didn't know what else to do. So I drove. I also took that chance to call my former FFA advisor and tell her I was freaking out. Well, actually, I texted her saying, "I need my FFA mom," but she quickly called me to find out what was wrong. The woman is a saint, I swear. Half an hour of talking and she said all the things I needed to hear. In short, she told me she loves me, informed me that I need to put my pride aside this year and know when to ask for help, encouraged me by saying she knows I will be able to handle everything on my plate, and finished by saying she expects to be seeing my name pop up on her caller ID because she is always there when I need help. Honestly, what else could I ask for?
I am nervous about school. Not as much as some of my friends, I think, but heck you've got to be at least a little apprehensive about it. It's a pretty big change. I'm moving two hours away from the place I've lived my entire life. I'm not going there with many friends. I'm moving in with a girl I have met once. And the classes... well... those are obviously making me have mini panic attacks. But I have to say, I'm more excited about it than I am nervous and deep down I know I am capable of doing this and doing it well.
I'd talk about my day today, but honestly it consisted of working then coming home and sleeping. Woke up a little while ago to have dinner with my brothers, and honestly I'll probably call it an early night because I have to wake up early, run errands, and probably begin the packing process tomorrow.
Respectfully,
me
or
B) I'm just too lazy to do it.
Either way...
Yesterday was... interesting... Me, Casey, Becca, Jake, Ryan, and Owen went to Canobie Lake Park as a last hurrah since Bec, Casey, and Jake leave this weekend for school. I'll see Jake when I move out there next weekend because we're at the same college... Bec and Casey however... well... I'm going to miss those lovely ladies. Ryan I will probably see again next week because he's staying home for school. Owen... well our little high school buddy will be around I'm sure.
Leaving the park is when all the fun began. We arrived at Casey's house, the first victim of the drop off... well here and Becca cried and I of course made fun of them for it. Not without hugging them, and singing to Casey though. "Oh, chiiiiild. Things are gunna get ea-si-errr" Back in the truck, and on to my house where Becca clung to me for a while before saying goodbye.
Then, for no reason whatsoever I had a breakdown. All of a sudden the reality of college set it and I just had to go for a drive. I didn't know what else to do. So I drove. I also took that chance to call my former FFA advisor and tell her I was freaking out. Well, actually, I texted her saying, "I need my FFA mom," but she quickly called me to find out what was wrong. The woman is a saint, I swear. Half an hour of talking and she said all the things I needed to hear. In short, she told me she loves me, informed me that I need to put my pride aside this year and know when to ask for help, encouraged me by saying she knows I will be able to handle everything on my plate, and finished by saying she expects to be seeing my name pop up on her caller ID because she is always there when I need help. Honestly, what else could I ask for?
I am nervous about school. Not as much as some of my friends, I think, but heck you've got to be at least a little apprehensive about it. It's a pretty big change. I'm moving two hours away from the place I've lived my entire life. I'm not going there with many friends. I'm moving in with a girl I have met once. And the classes... well... those are obviously making me have mini panic attacks. But I have to say, I'm more excited about it than I am nervous and deep down I know I am capable of doing this and doing it well.
I'd talk about my day today, but honestly it consisted of working then coming home and sleeping. Woke up a little while ago to have dinner with my brothers, and honestly I'll probably call it an early night because I have to wake up early, run errands, and probably begin the packing process tomorrow.
Respectfully,
me
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
2:00 am
I'll never understand my sleeping habits. I could easily sleep all day, and once the sun sets I am wide awake. I blame it somehow on my mother because she used to work night shifts and I feel like that rubbed off on me in some way. Don't ask... I'm just trying to justify blogging at such a ridiculous hour.
I am supposed to be waking up in about 7 hours to get ready to go to the beach with Becca and Casey. Leave it to graduating high school to start forming a circle of friends to hang out with. My own fault I suppose. I chose bad friends my first two years, got a serious boyfriend the third year and hung out with his circle of friends, and when we broke up in my final year I was forced to re-evaluate who I had in my life. Not a bad thing though in my opinion. This summer has been very good to me with friendships. I have gotten pretty close to a few friends, one of whom I feel very comfortable sharing ridiculous problems with and the others I love spending my nights with. And heck, 12 days from now I'll be living on a campus with approximately 35,000 students... I'm bound to form at least a few relationships out there.
I'm in a strange mood tonight. Not necessarily sad, but not at all happy either. I feel like laying under the stars with... well... anyone to be honest. Anyone who would have a conversation with me about something deep and profound. Perhaps something spiritual. I'm in the mood to discuss God and Heaven and the human soul, and how it all comes in to play when you're laying in the cool grass looking up at the universe surrounding you. To feel that small is so scary, but so beautiful at the same time, and I just want to talk about that with anyone who will listen. The comforting noise of crickets chirping is helping fuel this need also.
I wonder if I will still feel these things a week from Sunday when I'm living on a college campus. I wonder if my roommate will understand if I explain this feeling. I wonder if she's the type of girl who will go for a walk with me on a nice night like this and just talk and become best friends. I wonder if she'll stay up late with me when I'm having one of those nights when I just can't fall asleep because the world just has too much for me to think about. I don't mind this feeling at all though, just to make myself perfectly clear. I say I'm not happy, but it's not a bad feeling. I think it's a perfectly normal, perfectly healthy, perfectly perfect thing to feel at 2:00 am. It makes me feel alive in a weird way.
Maybe I should stop blogging now and actually try to fall asleep. The world's issues will be here tomorrow night, as will this blog. Til next we meet, I suppose.
Respectfully,
me
I am supposed to be waking up in about 7 hours to get ready to go to the beach with Becca and Casey. Leave it to graduating high school to start forming a circle of friends to hang out with. My own fault I suppose. I chose bad friends my first two years, got a serious boyfriend the third year and hung out with his circle of friends, and when we broke up in my final year I was forced to re-evaluate who I had in my life. Not a bad thing though in my opinion. This summer has been very good to me with friendships. I have gotten pretty close to a few friends, one of whom I feel very comfortable sharing ridiculous problems with and the others I love spending my nights with. And heck, 12 days from now I'll be living on a campus with approximately 35,000 students... I'm bound to form at least a few relationships out there.
I'm in a strange mood tonight. Not necessarily sad, but not at all happy either. I feel like laying under the stars with... well... anyone to be honest. Anyone who would have a conversation with me about something deep and profound. Perhaps something spiritual. I'm in the mood to discuss God and Heaven and the human soul, and how it all comes in to play when you're laying in the cool grass looking up at the universe surrounding you. To feel that small is so scary, but so beautiful at the same time, and I just want to talk about that with anyone who will listen. The comforting noise of crickets chirping is helping fuel this need also.
I wonder if I will still feel these things a week from Sunday when I'm living on a college campus. I wonder if my roommate will understand if I explain this feeling. I wonder if she's the type of girl who will go for a walk with me on a nice night like this and just talk and become best friends. I wonder if she'll stay up late with me when I'm having one of those nights when I just can't fall asleep because the world just has too much for me to think about. I don't mind this feeling at all though, just to make myself perfectly clear. I say I'm not happy, but it's not a bad feeling. I think it's a perfectly normal, perfectly healthy, perfectly perfect thing to feel at 2:00 am. It makes me feel alive in a weird way.
Maybe I should stop blogging now and actually try to fall asleep. The world's issues will be here tomorrow night, as will this blog. Til next we meet, I suppose.
Respectfully,
me
Sunday, August 23, 2009
College?
Well I leave exactly two weeks from today, and I have to remember to thank my future roommate for waking me up this morning via a text message reminding me of this. That's alright though. I appreciate her enthusiasm. We'll certainly get along well come September 6th. That is, of course, once we figure out this business of her needing complete darkness to fall asleep... and me being absolutely petrified of the dark. I'm not too worried about that just yet though.
I am leaving for my cousins 38th birthday party in about 20 minutes. She's having it at Build a Bear. Ha, boy do I love my crazy family. But my mom pointed out that this will be the last time I see a majority of these relatives for a while since I do leave in two weeks and probably won't see any of them until sometime around Thanksgiving I'm sure. She also informed me that she's making me a bear to bring with me to school. While I protested that I certainly did NOT want a stuffed animal going to college with me (because I've never been a fan of them in general, not just because I'm a college kid now), she won't take no for an answer. She ALSO called me an adult for the first time ever today. All too much growing up in just one day if you ask me. I'm feeling pretty weird and just wanted to get this all out so I made a blog on here since I know a lot of people use it, and perhaps I'll continue doing this frequently. It'd be nice, I think.
Respectfully,
me
I am leaving for my cousins 38th birthday party in about 20 minutes. She's having it at Build a Bear. Ha, boy do I love my crazy family. But my mom pointed out that this will be the last time I see a majority of these relatives for a while since I do leave in two weeks and probably won't see any of them until sometime around Thanksgiving I'm sure. She also informed me that she's making me a bear to bring with me to school. While I protested that I certainly did NOT want a stuffed animal going to college with me (because I've never been a fan of them in general, not just because I'm a college kid now), she won't take no for an answer. She ALSO called me an adult for the first time ever today. All too much growing up in just one day if you ask me. I'm feeling pretty weird and just wanted to get this all out so I made a blog on here since I know a lot of people use it, and perhaps I'll continue doing this frequently. It'd be nice, I think.
Respectfully,
me
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