Home for the Holidays

Hello, reader. I want to warn you right off the bat, this blog may seam a little sad. Keep reading all the way though, and I promise it will turn out good! With that said, on to the blogging!

So for plenty of reasons, the past week wasn't the best for me. Going home from college is a bitter-sweet experience in my opinion. It's nice to see my family and friends that I love. We get to catch up with each other and go to all the hang outs and do everything we did before we all went off to college.
At the same time, there are things back home I was trying to get away from. Bad memories, things I've moved on from... things that make me a little anxious about when I am back home.
I got to do a lot of thinking while I was home, especially on this topic. I spent a very long time last night on the phone with an amazing friend (even more amazing for answering my phone call at 1:30 am and listening to me cry until 3 am. I'm so lucky to have someone who cares enough to do that!) and we talked about this. And then I talked to another friend today going through similar problems, and both of those combined put things in perspective.
Everyone has parts of their past that make them uneasy. We all have things that bother us that we'd rather forget even exist. Unfortunately, it's impossible to push those things aside. Instead, we have to face them head on. That's the only way to accept, move on, and grow from the experience. By doing this we become stronger and wiser, and we won't fall victim to the same unfortunate events in our future. That's the mistake I had been making. I was ignoring my past rather than learning from it. I was trying to run and hide and that's never the answer. So from this day forward, I am making a promise to myself that I will work to accept and learn from these unfortunate events and try to grow as a person. This way, I ensure my future will be brighter and better off.

Now I feel like a big bummer, and I hate to be a downer. I believe pain brings progress though, so I don't even mind that I had a crummy week. I've been living day to day just reminding myself of two of my favorite quotes: "In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life; it. goes. on." ~ Robert Frost. "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity. An optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty" ~ Winston Churchill. With these ideas wedged deep inside my heart, I will pull through. =]

On a happier note, I am back at UMass and ready to finish these last two weeks of classes! I can't believe I am so close to finishing my first semester of college. I admit, my grades could be a little better... but next semester I will bring them up now that I've set up a routine and have acclimated. But man, I can't wait to experience all the happiness the Christmas season brings. It's so beautiful and wonderful and amazing and magical. I don't care how old I get, Christmas will ALWAYS be magic!

Until next we meet.
Respectfully,
me